Viewer's Remorse

Television. Whether you consider it to be an art form, a cheap form of entertainment, or a means by which lobotomies can be performed sans incision, you have to admit that it's an integral part of our lives. Crazier yet, now with DVRs, there is the expectation that you have seen everything.

I mean, who wouldn't watch The Simpsons, Family Guy, Deal or No Deal, Jeopardy, Lost, Desperate Housewives, Flip That House, Project Runway, Dancing With Stars, The World Series and Monster Garage all in the same evening?

Did I forget Nip/Tuck, Scrubs, Cavemen, Nanny 911, The Search For the Next Elvira, How I Met Your Mother and Green Acres?

How about a couple of movies? High School Musical, anyone? And I haven't even begun to tap the premium cable networks.

The point is that there was once a time when we didn't have answering machines for our phones. You called someone and if they didn't answer you just tried again later. No harm, no foul. We as people were OK with not being permanently interlaced into the social fabric.

Then came the cell phone. You know the rest...

While I will be the first person to lay the smackdown on someone attempting to pry my generically branded TiVo from my grubby little mitts, I can't help but wonder how nice life might be if I never had it in the first place.